I have cancer

 Yes...you did read that title correctly. 

I have the dreaded "C" word. I have been diagnosed as having Stage 1C Ovarian cancer. I'm still trying to wrap my head around it, as is my sweet husband. 

Are we ok? We seem to be. But are we really? No, not at all. Are we trying to be ok about this?? Yes, yes we are. Neither one of us wants to talk about it, though. Which is normal for a lot of people. Others talk about it a good bit, while others obsess over it. 

This is one thing I refuse to obsess over. I want to live my life the best that I can. I want to spend all the time I can with my husband and my pups. I want to work a lot. I want to experience life and maybe even motherhood if that is in the cards.

My life up to this point has not been a normal life...at least to me. But that's a ok. Normalcy can be really boring. Expect the unexpected...isn't that the saying?? So far, that's what I'm doing. 

God is always testing. He is waiting for me to come back to him as I go through this. He is an always loving God. I am His beloved, and He is mine. He wants me to put my trust in Him. He wants to listen to me and listen to all of my complaints and my celebrations. He wants me to tell him EVERYTHING. He already knows it. But he still wants to listen to ME tell Him the story.